It’s okay to be alone

I know so many of us long for a grand circle of friends who are always there for us and have our backs no matter what. I used to. I had that circle, or I thought I did, before I had kids. After kids, my friends list slowly shortened. My focus shifted to my family instead of hanging with friends. Most of them didn’t have kids yet and some still don’t so they weren’t so understanding.

There will be those “friends” who will always say ‘We need to hang out soon!’ ‘I miss you!’ ‘I promise I’ll come see you soon!’ If someone like this comes to mind, don’t worry because you’re not the only one who fell for their b.s. I used to have one ‘friend’ like that and here just recently she showed me the final slap in the face that proved she was meant to be a lesson. I kept believing the lie that she considered me her friend when in all actuality we weren’t. True friends are there for you and want to see you succeed.

But I am thankful she showed me where I stood in her life. It was a huge step in my self awareness. I don’t deserve to be in someone’s life and be that friend that they don’t want there. I deserve to be surrounded by genuine people who care about me. It is okay to only think about your happiness. If you feel like someone isn’t being a true friend, good chance they aren’t. People are meant to come into our lives at specific times and their presence is meant to teach us a lesson. Some good some bad but all are necessary. 

Through social media I have met some amazing people. But trying to make friends in today’s world is a bit difficult. I met my best friend over social media. She and I took up like we were old friends from the first day we chatted over the phone. My best friend doesn’t live in the same state as me. We’ve never met in person but when we connected it was like we have known eachother our whole lives… And we were born before this crazy everyone has a cell phone and social media craze. I know that’s a crazy thing to believe but it was like that ‘way back when’. 

But it isn’t that easy most of the time. I have tried to befriend others over social media. And by befriending, I mean more than just the occassional like and/or comment. I mean a genuine friendship where we are friends outside of social media. I love and appreciate all of my social media friends but as a human being, we all need those connections outside of our technology. But what happens 99% of the time when someone tries to have a genuine chat with someone on social media? “Who is this weirdo?” I know this phrase because I have thought it several times!! 

By going through this weird social media trying to make real friends journey I have come to the realization that most people could care less about me. This meant I had to come to terms with the fact that it is okay to be alone. It is okay to be the only one rooting yourself on. It is okay to have a small circle of friends. The smaller the circle the more genuine it is. 

 

 

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